My Grandmother, a feisty 91 and living alone in a small town in Oregon, had a total hip replacement and was house bound. Our family, not being nearby, was concerned for her welfare and called Meals on Wheels. We let the service know how Grandmother didn’t like the idea of being dependant on anyone for anything.
The next day a volunteer phoned Grandmother and cheerfully explained that Meals on Wheels is a service which relies on volunteers to help the elderly and the ill. Would she be interested in it?
There was a reflective pause. "Well, sure," my grandmother said. "If you can't find anyone else to get food to the old people, I guess I can."
Some hit songs of the 60s and 70s are being revised with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers. They include:
Herman's Hermits: Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker
The Bee Gees: How Can You Mend a Broken Hip?
Bobby Darin: Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash
Ringo Starr: I Get By With a Little Help from Depends
Roberta Flack: The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face
Johnny Nash: I Can't See Clearly Now
Paul Simon: Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver
Commodores: Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom
Marvin Gaye: I Heard it Through the GrapeNuts
Procol Harem: A Whiter Shade of Hair
Leo Sayer: You Make Me Feel Like Napping
Morris, an 82 year-old man, went to the doctor to get a physical. A few days later the doctor saw Morris walking down the street with a gorgeous young woman on his arm.
A couple of days later the doctor spoke to Morris and said, "You're really doing great, aren't you?"
Morris replied, "Just doing what you said, Doc: 'Get a hot mamma and be cheerful.'"
The doctor said, "I didn't say that. I said, 'You've got a heart murmur. Be careful.'"
Everyone is texting these days and the lauguage is shifting because of it. We all know what LOL and BFF mean, don't we? Well for seniors - things take on a whole new meaning!
ATD - At the Doctor's
BFF - Best Friend's Funeral
BTW - Bring the Wheelchair
BYOT - Bring Your Own Teeth
CBM - Covered by Medicare
CUATSC - See You at the Senior Center
DWI - Driving While Incontinent
FWIW - Forgot Where I Was
FYI - Found Your Insulin
GGPBL - Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low GHA - Got Heartburn Again HGBM - Had Good Bowel Movement IMHO - Is My Hearing-Aid On?
LMDO - Laughing My Dentures Out
LOL - Living on Lipitor
LWO - Lawrence Welk's On
OMMR - On My Massage Recliner
OMSG - Oh My! Sorry, Gas
ROFL...CGU - Rolling on the Floor Laughing...Can't get Up!
TTYL - Talk to You Louder
WAITT - Who Am I Talking To?
WTP - Where's the Prunes
WWNO - Walker Wheels Need Oil
Hope these help!
GGLKI - Gotta Go, Laxative Kicking in!
My Grandmother, a feisty 91 and living alone in a small town in Oregon, had a total hip replacement and was house bound. Our family, not being nearby, was concerned for her welfare and called Meals on Wheels. We let the service know how Grandmother didn’t like the idea of being dependant on anyone for anything.
